Family Forum / Parenting / Adoption / November 2007

Many of them are strong enough to say "no thanks" to the birthchild.  And
boy, how good does THAT feel.

Mind you, I only know the "birthchild's" point of view.

They are seriously confusing privacy with anonymity over there.

I am a birthmom who

Some of them think that the state has a duty to protect the bmother's
'privacy' - yet hypocritically object to the state putting amended on a
birth certificate because:

"Don't you see a problem with a person NEVER learning that they are adopted?
I think that people have a RIGHT to know that they are adopted, period.

Reply -Yes I think kids should know. But it is not the states job to tell
them."

Where does one sign up to have the state protect one from the messiness of
life due to one's past conduct?  'Cuz I have a few things I'd like to
register for ;)

It's also interesting to see one of them (a moderator no less) insisting
that

". .  a birth certificate is NOT a birth history. Its an identification
document."

"Its SOLE purpose is to indentify me legally as the person listed on the
document."

"I am just trying to be very clear in my stance that a birth cert is not
anything more than a legal document documenting your legal existence, and
not your biological identity."

If this is the case then why are they called *birth* certificates?

I generally avoid moderated boards but am awaiting activation so that I can
pose those questions ;o

Your input as a bmother might actually make them think but some of them are
pretty closed minded.  One of the adoptees there tried to get them to think
about the wider issues of adoption but got the typical 'angry, ungrateful
adoptee' bs feedback

Kathy 1

P.S.  Marley I'd like to see you debate there too as I think they were
referring to you in one exchange in which one of the women checked out our
board and said:

Over at the board FG linked to (and linked us to) there are a few people who
refer to international adoption as "neo-colonialism" and the process of
adoption as "faux-breeding." That's hatred and hysteria.

Other gag worthy quotes:

So you'd prefer that they would have aborted you and given you no chance at
life? I mean that's the option here. I read your link and it's a lot of
hateful, sad people. Sometimes biological parents can't do the job they
should at least those that place their children realize that vs. abusing
them or resenting them. I am sorry you are so hurt and angry but, really
can't you say at least they cared enough to give me life and want me to do
well. It does have to hurt that they couldn't raise you, I get that but,
really if their options were abortion or adoption aren't you glad they chose
adoption?

Maybe someone should start a blog. I hear adoptees are as angry as atheists.

It's really only the irrational fringe that talks about "the profile" of
adoptive parents and "Russian Roullette" when you adopt out.

Entering a no holds barred debate board such as this one and attempting to
debate a subject that one holds THAT dear to one's heart is simply foolish
in my opinion.

The last one is too funny - a *moderated* no holds barred debate board?
They don't know what the real thing looks like lol