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Family Forum / Parenting / Adoption / September 2008



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Aren't Safe Havens Great?

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Robibnikoff - 25 Sep 2008 17:46 GMT
10 kids, including family of 9, abandoned
By TIMBERLY ROSS, Associated Press Writer 59 minutes ago

Ten children ranging in age from 1 to 17 were left at hospitals Wednesday
under Nebraska's unique safe haven law, which allows caregivers to abandon
not only infants but also teenagers without fear of prosecution.

Nine of the children came from one family. The six boys and three girls were
left by their father, who was not identified, at Creighton University
Medical Center's emergency room. An unrelated 11-year-old boy also was
surrendered Wednesday.

The law, which went into effect in July, was initially intended to protect
infants, but was amended to include the word "child," which some have
interpreted under Nebraska law to mean anyone under the age of 19.

At least 14 children have been abandoned since the state's new safe haven
law took effect.

The children are OK, said Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services
spokeswoman Kathie Osterman said. She didn't know why their father had left
them.

More information will be available at a late morning news conference,
Osterman said.

Nebraska was the last state in the nation to adopt a safe-haven law. Under
previous law, a parent who abandoned a baby could have been charged with
child neglect or abandonment, both misdemeanors, or child abuse, a felony.

State Sen. Arnie Stuthman said he introduced the bill intending to protect
infants. In a compromise with senators worried about arbitrary age limits,
the measure was expanded.

Abandoning teenagers was not the original intent of the law, Stuthman said
Thursday.

"People are leaving them off just because they can't control them," he said.
"They're probably in no real danger, so it's an easy way out for the
caretaker."
Signature

Robyn
Resident Witchypoo
BAAWA Knight!
#1557
If you can't be a good example....
You'll just have to be a horrible warning.

kippaherring@hotmail.com - 25 Sep 2008 18:00 GMT
Wow. Just wow.
rkbose@pacific.net.sg - 25 Sep 2008 20:21 GMT
On Sep 25, 10:00 am, kippaherr...@hotmail.com wrote:
> Wow. Just wow.

I wonder, in the case of the nine kids, whether it wasn't also "can't
afford them" and not "can't control them."

Sounds like it is "a front door to Social Services" that someone
called it.
kippaherring@hotmail.com - 25 Sep 2008 22:45 GMT
On Sep 25, 3:21 pm, "rkb...@pacific.net.sg" <rkb...@pacific.net.sg>
wrote:
> On Sep 25, 10:00 am, kippaherr...@hotmail.com wrote:
>
> > Wow. Just wow.
>
> I wonder, in the case of the nine kids, whether it wasn't also "can't
> afford them" and not "can't control them."

Indeed. I too wondered to what extent it was the stupid economy.

> Sounds like it is "a front door to Social Services" that someone
> called it.

Better probably than the street.
rkbose@pacific.net.sg - 26 Sep 2008 01:56 GMT
On Sep 25, 2:45 pm, kippaherr...@hotmail.com wrote:
> On Sep 25, 3:21 pm, "rkb...@pacific.net.sg" <rkb...@pacific.net.sg>
> wrote:
[quoted text clipped - 12 lines]
>
> Better probably than the street.

True.

Certainly in the case of older kids, there isn't any anonymity.
Why not meld the SH program into SS?

Only thing is, babies have a good chance of finding families. Older
kids - probably not.
kippaherring@hotmail.com - 27 Sep 2008 03:16 GMT
On Sep 25, 8:56 pm, "rkb...@pacific.net.sg" <rkb...@pacific.net.sg>
wrote:

> Why not meld the SH program into SS?

Why not? Because the law was misbegotten at (from?) conception.
It allows for anonymous abandonment, circumvents best practice and
ignores identity rights, including social and medical history.
It also preys on the vulnerability of those least equipped to deal
with crisis family predicaments - most especially the poor and
dispossessed.
I don't believe for a moment that melding the SH program with SS
(which are more than over-burdened and byzantine enough already) would
help alleviate social problems, and I'm flummoxed why anybody would.
In fact I think such a move would have the opposite effect.
kippaherring@hotmail.com - 27 Sep 2008 03:41 GMT
Update: http://www.wnbc.com/family/17565500/detail.html

Dad Who Left 9 Kids Says He Was Overwhelmed
Mother Died 17 Months Ago, Man Says
September 26, 2008

OMAHA, Neb. -- The mother of nine kids left at a Nebraska hospital
emergency room died from a brain aneurysm 17 months ago, days after
delivering the youngest child, said the father.
Local station KETV reported that state officials said Gary Staton
dropped off his kids at 8 p.m. Wednesday.
"I was with her for 17 years, and then she was gone. What was I going
to do?" Staton said. "We raised them together. I didn't think I could
do it alone. I fell apart. I couldn't take care of them."

Staton said he was overwhelmed by his family responsibilities and had
to quit his job. He said he couldn't pay the rent or utilities.
"I was able to get the kids to a safe place before they were
homeless," he said.
He said he made the final decision Wednesday to take the children to
an Omaha hospital. He said he handed a woman there the birth
certificates and said he was there to surrender his kids.
"I hope they know I love them," he said. "I hope their future is
better without me around them."
Staton will not be charged because of Nebraska's new safe haven law,
which states any child under the age of 19 can be left at a hospital
if they're in immediate danger.
The law was implemented in July; before Wednesday, only three
children, ages 11, 13 and 15, had been dropped off at hospitals.
Staton and his wife were cited in 2004 for child neglect, according to
Omaha police records.
An article in a North High School newspaper quoted Staton's oldest
daughter as saying she graduated at 16, in part to care for her
younger siblings.
"I was always feeding kids, checking homework and sending kids to
bed," Amoria Micek was quoted in the paper as saying. "I just don't
have anyone backing me up any more."
Relatives May Be Granted Custody

Relatives of the mine siblings law may be granted custody.
A spokeswoman for the state department Health and Human Services said
Friday that a number of family members have volunteered to take the
siblings.
Staff members are doing the required background checks in hopes of
placing the children in the next few days.
The spokeswoman says the father did not reach out to relatives for
help before abandoning them.
State May Revisit Safe Haven Law
Nebraska lawmakers said they may need to clarify the law, which was
intended to protect newborn children, if a parent is overwhelmed.
The state's Department of Health and Human Services is also reacting.
Nebraska's safe haven law was not intended for those having difficulty
parenting defiant and unruly youths, according to the department.
Thus, parents may still be charged.
"There seems to be a misconception that when a child is dropped off at
a hospital, the parents are absolved of responsibility. That couldn't
be further from the truth," said Toddy Landry, director of the
Division of Children and Family Services in Department of Health and
Human Services.
Landry said in a press release Thursday that the courts will get
involved in the lives of families that drop off children.
He said courts are likely to require parents and guardians to
participate in parenting classes, family therapy, conflict resolution
or other services and may order child support payments while they are
in state custody.
"I am very concerned about the situations we've seen so far. I
empathize with parents who aren't sure where to turn, but I want to
encourage those families to use other options before taking the
drastic step of abandoning a child," Landry said in the release.
Other options include community support groups, crisis hot lines,
treatment centers or other services. Faith-based community services
can also be a source of support, Landry said.
rkbose@pacific.net.sg - 27 Sep 2008 06:19 GMT
On Sep 26, 7:41 pm, kippaherr...@hotmail.com wrote:
> Update:http://www.wnbc.com/family/17565500/detail.html

> "There seems to be a misconception that when a child is dropped off at
> a hospital, the parents are absolved of responsibility. That couldn't
[quoted text clipped - 14 lines]
> treatment centers or other services. Faith-based community services
> can also be a source of support, Landry said.

So what it's amounting to is absolution of responsibility if the child
is not identified/ indentifiable. Otherwise, they may pay child
support to the state...
kippaherring@hotmail.com - 27 Sep 2008 13:47 GMT
On Sep 27, 1:19 am, "rkb...@pacific.net.sg" <rkb...@pacific.net.sg>
wrote:
> On Sep 26, 7:41 pm, kippaherr...@hotmail.com wrote:
>
[quoted text clipped - 22 lines]
> is not identified/ indentifiable. Otherwise, they may pay child
> support to the state...

So it would seem.
Hardly about connecting families at the end of their tether to SS so
that they can be helped.
kat - 27 Sep 2008 19:24 GMT
> Update: http://www.wnbc.com/family/17565500/detail.html
>
[quoted text clipped - 65 lines]
> encourage those families to use other options before taking the
> drastic step of abandoning a child," Landry said in the release.

Unless of course it is an infant than by all means dump that kid.  In fact
you will be called 'heroic' for doing so.

Kathy
kippaherring@hotmail.com - 27 Sep 2008 19:36 GMT
> <kippaherr...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
>
[quoted text clipped - 72 lines]
> Unless of course it is an infant than by all means dump that kid.  In fact
> you will be called 'heroic' for doing so.

Of course.
It's 'Dumpmother, Good Mother: Her Story of Heroic Redemption'  ;-)
kippaherring@hotmail.com - 28 Sep 2008 14:53 GMT
Includes a survey, 'Expanding The Safe Haven Law?' which claims that
65% of respondents support expanding the law to include all ages!
One has to wonder.

http://www.kcci.com/news/17564344/detail.html

Neb. Father Talks About Abandoning His 9 Kids
Recent Cases Involving Teens Test Nebraska's Safe Haven Law
September 26, 2008

OMAHA, Neb. -- A Nebraska father who dropped his nine kids off at a
hospital under the state's Safe Haven law is talking about his
decision.
Survey: Expanding The Safe Haven Law?
Gary Staton said the mother of nine kids left at an emergency room in
Creighton University Medical Center died from a brain aneurysm 17
months ago, days after delivering the youngest child.

Staton dropped off the kids Wednesday night at 8 p.m., officials at
the Department of Health and Human Services said.
"I was with her for 17 years, and then she was gone. What was I going
to do?" Staton said. "We raised them together. I didn't think I could
do it alone. I fell apart. I couldn't take care of them."
Staton said he was overwhelmed by his family responsibilities and had
to quit his job. He said he couldn't pay the rent or utilities.
"I was able to get the kids to a safe place before they were
homeless," he said.
He said he made the final decision Wednesday to take the children to
Creighton University Medical Center. He said he handed a woman there
the birth certificates and said he was there to surrender his kids.
"I hope they know I love them," he said. "I hope their future is
better without me around them."

Past History
Staton and his wife were cited in 2004 for child neglect. An article
in a North High School newspaper quoted Staton's oldest daughter as
saying she graduated at 16, in part to care for her younger siblings.
"I was always feeding kids, checking homework and sending kids to
bed," Amoria Micek was quoted in the paper as saying. "I just don't
have anyone backing me up any more."
The state's Department of Health and Human Services confirmed that an
15-year-old boy was taken to Immanuel Hospital at 5 p.m. and an 11-
year-old boy was taken to the same hospital at 8:30 p.m.
One of the boys was placed in foster care and the other is still at
the hospital undergoing evaluation.
The case brings the total number of children left at Omaha hospitals
during the past 24 hours to 11.
See a report of all Nebraska's Safe Haven Cases
Staton will not be charged because of Nebraska's new Safe Haven law,
which states any child under the age of 19 can be left at a hospital
if they're in immediate danger.
The two additional cases are the fifth and sixth tests of the state's
Safe Haven.
Before Wednesday, children ages 11, 13, and 15 were dropped off at
hospitals since the law was implemented in July.
State May Revisit Safe Haven Law
Nebraska lawmakers said they may need to clarify the law, which was
intended to protect newborn children, if a parent is overwhelmed.
Further, Nebraska Gov. Dave Heineman called for an amendment to the
state's Safe Haven law Thursday, saying lawmakers likely wrote the
bill too broad of a stroke.
"I'm absolutely surprised. When this bill was being discussed in the
legislature, we had the discussion that this was going to be about
young children and when they were in immediate danger," Heineman said
at an opening for an early childhood care center in Millard. "Like the
rest of the country, we wanted to be there to help. Unfortunately they
wrote the language too broad. We now need to amend that to change
that."
Heineman urged parents to take advantage of area nonprofits instead of
abandoning children at hospitals.
"I want to continue to encourage parents to really think twice before
you leave your kids at a hospital, unless they're in danger," he said.
Department of Health and Human Services Reacts
Nebraska's Safe Haven law was not intended for those having difficulty
parenting defiant and unruly youths, according to the state's
Department of Health and Human Services.
Thus, they may still be charged.
"There seems to be a misconception that when a child is dropped off at
a hospital, the parents are absolved of responsibility. That couldn't
be further from the truth," said Toddy Landry, director of the
Division of Children and Family Services in Department of Health and
Human Services.
Landry said in a press release Thursday that the courts will get
involved in the lives of families who drop off children.
He said courts are likely to require parents and guardians to
participate in parenting classes, family therapy, conflict resolution
or other services and may order child support payments while they are
in state custody.
"I am very concerned about the situations we've seen so far. I
empathize with parents who aren't sure where to turn, but I want to
encourage those families to use other options before taking the
drastic step of abandoning a child," Landry said in the release.
Other options include community support groups, crisis hot lines,
treatment centers or other services. Faith-based community services
can also be a source of support, Landry said.
"Get the help before you get so desperate to where you drop off your
kids at the hospital," said April Blevins, of Lutheran Family Services.
rkbose@pacific.net.sg - 27 Sep 2008 06:15 GMT
On Sep 26, 7:16 pm, kippaherr...@hotmail.com wrote:
> On Sep 25, 8:56 pm, "rkb...@pacific.net.sg" <rkb...@pacific.net.sg>
> wrote:
[quoted text clipped - 11 lines]
> help alleviate social problems, and I'm flummoxed why anybody would.
> In fact I think such a move would have the opposite effect.

I don't think it would alleviate social problems, either; but I'm
being realistic. Most states have an SH program. Most SH kids are
moved into the SS system immediately afterward, because that's what
the governments have in place to deal with kids. Rather than having a
separate entity that acts, as whoever it was put it, as a front door
to SS, why not let SS do the whole thing?

Then you get into whether SS needs reform - which it probably does,
from everything I've read. But I don't see how a separate SH program
solves anything. It's not like they have any special arrangements to
care for the kids. At least by merging them, you'll have the regular
intake procedures.
kippaherring@hotmail.com - 27 Sep 2008 13:36 GMT
On Sep 27, 1:15 am, "rkb...@pacific.net.sg" <rkb...@pacific.net.sg>
wrote:
> On Sep 26, 7:16 pm, kippaherr...@hotmail.com wrote:
>
[quoted text clipped - 26 lines]
> care for the kids. At least by merging them, you'll have the regular
> intake procedures.

Well, since the concept of SHs repugnant to me (for personal reasons
among others - if they'd been around when my first son was born, I've
no doubt my mother at least would have pushed to have him SHed -
anonymity and all), I don't think it's a good idea.
It seems clear to me that that mixing them into the morass of SS would
only make it more difficult to subject them to proper scrutiny - and
would do zilch to encourage SS reform.
Marley - 29 Sep 2008 17:49 GMT
I've got another new blog up on the Nebraska situation.

http://bastardette.blogspot.com

Marley
rkbose@pacific.net.sg - 29 Sep 2008 20:39 GMT
> I've got another new blog up on the Nebraska situation.
>
> http://bastardette.blogspot.com
>
> Marley

Gotta say it sounds heart-breaking.

Seems like SHing some of those kids was the *only* route to getting
them help. Not the front door, not a side door, the only door.

I doubt that it's only Nebraska. It's made visible by the SH law, but
my guess is that these impossible situations exist in every state,
that support for families is trivial, and in most cases these kids end
up hurting others and themselves and prison is the caregiver of the
last resort.
 
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