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Family Forum / Marriage / Divorce / October 2004We Settled!
Hi again all, I have been very busy with work and with wraping up my divorce. I miss you guys! My STBX, her attorney, my attorney and myself met last Friday and settled the case. She get's the house and furniture, I get my business, some personal accounts, and a decent amount of cash through a refinance she has to do. I feel a little screwed, but I guess that means it was a fair settlement? I read that somewhere. After we finished, my STBX asked me if I wanted to have lunch with her. I said sure. Then she asked the attorneys if they wanted to have lunch with us as well. Long story short, both attorneys, my STBX and I all went out and had lunch! My attorney told me later that he has NEVER known that to happen before. The good thing was we made the attorneys pay the lunch bill! I guess the moral of my story is not to let yourself become overwhelmed with hatred or any negative feelings towards your Ex. It just isn't worth it, you only hurt yourself. Of course we did not have a custody fight for our son, and each of us get's to have him 50% of the time. I understand it is much more difficult when you are fighting for something, especially if it's your child(ren). It was weird at the settlement conference. My STBX kept looking at me. I could see in her eyes that she still loves me, and that she knows she blew it. I will always have a special place in my heart for her. I guess being my first wife made it easier to love her more than I could ever love another. Sorry for the mushy post. I just feel good. Her and I have gotten along better the last few days than we have in the 15 months we have been separated. Good to be back. Big RJ > Hi again all, > [quoted text clipped - 33 lines] > > Big RJ Welcome back RJ, glad to hear it went well. :) -Cheryl > Big RJ wrote: > The good thing was we > made the attorneys pay the lunch bill! You may see it on *YOUR* bill... with a 20% mark-up. LOL!  SignatureQ. Why do Hell's Angels wear leather? A. Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. ~ Paul Lynde, on Hollywood Squares > Big RJ wrote: > Hi again all, [quoted text clipped - 35 lines] > > Big RJ Ok, serious, though. Good post. I'm always glad when people can get together and work through things like adults. SignatureQ. Why do Hell's Angels wear leather? A. Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. ~ Paul Lynde, on Hollywood Squares > Hi again all, > [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > to do. I feel a little screwed, but I guess that means it was a fair > settlement? I read that somewhere. If you BOTH feel a little screwed, that is a pretty good sign that it was a fair settlement. > > Hi again all, > > [quoted text clipped - 10 lines] > If you BOTH feel a little screwed, that is a pretty good sign that it was a > fair settlement. Yep Bill, you said it the way I had heard it. It looks okay to me. I don't know if she feels a little screwed, but I think she might by the look on her face when we negotiated the numbers. : Hi again all, : I have been very busy with work and with wraping up my divorce. I miss you : guys! : After we finished, my STBX asked me if I wanted to have lunch with her. I : said sure. Then she asked the attorneys if they wanted to have lunch with : us as well. Long story short, both attorneys, my STBX and I all went out : and had lunch! My attorney told me later that he has NEVER known that to : happen before. The good thing was we made the attorneys pay the lunch bill! My ex called me up and wanted to "get together and have a drink" (and probably attempt to rekindle the relationship). All of this after a 2 year drawn out divorce and groveling over money. I stayed away like she had the plague. It's interesting, isn't it? b. > : Hi again all, > [quoted text clipped - 16 lines] > > b. It is very interesting. She kept looking at me through out the meeting. I can tell she still feels it. I mean it was so damn obvious! I don't know why the hell that happens. Maybe she just saw "the good ship Big RJ" sailing away. She blew it. She had the affair, she didn't work hard with me to save the marriage. f.ck that, I don't need that in my life. See ya babe! Man I feel good today! I may have bent over for the cash she got, but I can make more. The most important things got taken care of (our boy). I never have to share my sh.t again. Pre-nup city, here I come! Big (and happy) RJ Heck, I can't resist this one (sorry Big RJ, I know where you're coming from in how this all feels)... >>> Hi again all, >> >>> I have been very busy with work and with wraping up my divorce. I miss you >>> guys! >> >>> After we finished, my STBX asked me if I wanted to have lunch with her. I >>> said sure. Then she asked the attorneys if they wanted to have lunch with >>> us as well. Long story short, both attorneys, my STBX and I all went out >>> and had lunch! My attorney told me later that he has NEVER known that to >>> happen before. The good thing was we made the attorneys pay the lunch bill! Silly boy! YOU paid for it! (no offense) The money you paid them was just turned around for the lunch, but it came out of YOUR pocket! I know I really bought lunch and a whole bunch more. I do have the emotional satisfaction that the divorce is almost final. I will pay my last attorney bill in about a months time..... > Heck, I can't resist this one (sorry Big RJ, I know where you're coming from > in how this all feels)... [quoted text clipped - 18 lines] > Silly boy! YOU paid for it! (no offense) The money you paid them > was just turned around for the lunch, but it came out of YOUR pocket! Well, that part sounds encouraging, RJ. Going thru this process of divorce is the Pits, for sure. Can we get much closer to Hell? (rhetorical) > I know I really bought lunch and a whole bunch more. I do have the > emotional satisfaction that the divorce is almost final. I will pay my last > attorney bill in about a months time..... > >> Heck, I can't resist this one (sorry Big RJ, I know where you're coming from >> in how this all feels)... >> >>>>> Hi again all, >>>> >>>>> I have been very busy with work and with wraping up my divorce. I miss >>>>> you guys! >>>> >>>>> After we finished, my STBX asked me if I wanted to have lunch with her. I >>>>> said sure. Then she asked the attorneys if they wanted to have lunch with >>>>> us as well. Long story short, both attorneys, my STBX and I all went out >>>>> and had lunch! My attorney told me later that he has NEVER known that to >>>>> happen before. The good thing was we made the attorneys pay the lunch >>>>> bill! >> >> Silly boy! YOU paid for it! (no offense) The money you paid them >> was just turned around for the lunch, but it came out of YOUR pocket! <Taps fists with RJ> Cool. > Hi again all, > [quoted text clipped - 38 lines] > > Big RJ > YooperBoyka wrote: > <Taps fists with RJ> > Cool. I like your responses. SignatureQ. Why do Hell's Angels wear leather? A. Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. ~ Paul Lynde, on Hollywood Squares >> YooperBoyka wrote: >> <Taps fists with RJ> >> Cool. > > I like your responses. Thanks. It's just brevity out of necessity, though. Thanks Yoop! Little bit of a roller coaster emotionally, but I can take this ride! > <Taps fists with RJ> > Cool. [quoted text clipped - 41 lines] > > > > Big RJ > The good thing was we made the > attorneys pay the lunch bill! That IS good news RJ! You ROCK, dude! Best - Fido |
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