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Family Forum / Marriage / Divorce / September 2005Relocation of child after divorce (UK)
Hi, my divorce was finalised on January of this year. The divorce itself was amicable and i became the primary carer of our 5 year old daughter. Rather than have any sort of custody battle with my ex-husband we amicably agreed on me being the primary carer and the primary contact for school/doctor etc and he would see his daughter on Mon/Wed/Fri and she would remain with me at all other times. I have been together with my new partner for almost 18 months and he already has a house, but we decided for stability reasons that we would continue to live near my ex-husband and rent out somewhere. This has now got to change and we need to move to my new partner's house. The house itself is only a 40min drive from where we are now, but of course we will have to change her school and she will come to live with us. I have no problem with my ex keeping the same dates/times to see our daughter but i think he may try and cause some problems, i.e. apply for custody. I was wondering if a) there is any way he could "force" us to stay in the area by saying it won't be practical to see his daughter or b) if there's any chance he may win any sort of custody battle. Our daughter is currently at a private school which is funded by my ex's parent's, but we would be moving her to a state school, would this have any bearing ? The only formal documentation either of us has signed was the "Arrangement for Children" form that was included in the divorce papers, which set out the times/days we would each see our daughter, the amount of child allowance that would be paid by him etc. Could anyone please offer me any opinions/advice.. Many thanks. All I can tell you is that judges in the States and probably the UK, are reluctant to change the child's living arrangement absent a some very good reason to do so, which is more than the inconvenience of a party. Its well-understood that children need stability, and the court will likely do what it can to maintain that stability. IMO, unless he can show you are unfit, its unlikely that he'll have a shot. =R= > Hi, my divorce was finalised on January of this year. The divorce > itself was amicable and i became the primary carer of our 5 year old [quoted text clipped - 39 lines] > > Many thanks. > All I can tell you is that judges in the States and probably the UK, > are reluctant to change the child's living arrangement absent a some [quoted text clipped - 3 lines] > unless he can show you are unfit, its unlikely that he'll have a shot. > =R= ...although I'm always skeptical of the "need" to move. I'm guessing "need" has very little to do with it. >> Hi, my divorce was finalised on January of this year. The divorce >> itself was amicable and i became the primary carer of our 5 year old [quoted text clipped - 39 lines] >> >> Many thanks. >>All I can tell you is that judges in the States and probably the UK, >>are reluctant to change the child's living arrangement absent a some [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] > ...although I'm always skeptical of the "need" to move. > I'm guessing "need" has very little to do with it. Ya think? Rambler >> All I can tell you is that judges in the States and probably the UK, >> are reluctant to change the child's living arrangement absent a some [quoted text clipped - 6 lines] >...although I'm always skeptical of the "need" to move. >I'm guessing "need" has very little to do with it. You and me both, Yoop. All to often, what we call "need" is really just what we *want*. rj Hi there. Living in the UK and I have 4 children (one now adult) who live with me. The "arrangements for the children form" is not to be worth the paper its written on after the event and bcause it is not legally binding. My ex had to move away and in doing so decided to drop all his responsibilities - different to your situation I realise - and he was free to do so, our arrangement at the time of the divorce means nothing - try uk.legal. Your ex could go back to court and ask for custody as is his right and who would blame him? He could get it on the strength of having her 3/7 nights a week and being nearer to her present school and other domestic set ups. When you say you do not mind your ex seeing his daughter, that is very different to actually taking responsibility for making sure she does see him. Do you mean you are going to make sure she does by driving the distance back that often if you move? You should do, but can you practically? Never mind anything legal I would ask you to think very carefully about whether you HAVE to move.......It is absolutely not in your daughter's interests at all it appears from what you have said here. I think by moving this child away from her father will further separate them. This is in no way for the good of the child is it? I never believed that it was a good idea to disrupt a child so one of the parents can get on with his or her own life with someone new. You said that you decided to stay close to the father for "stability" so does that mean you don't really care about the stability anymore? Why do you have to move your child in with the new guy, why can't you stay put until your child is of age? |
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