Family Forum / Parenting / Parenting / March 2007

Sounds lovely. Hope you get the weather to use it.

Hmm. I think that probably depends slightly on your children. If I'd told #1
at 3yo not to go near it unless I was with her (or daddy) she wouldn't have
gone at any time. #2 would be climbing the fence when ever possible to see
so I guess maybe chaining her to the side of the house would be the best
idea ;-P
We haven't got one btw.

The school pool has a nice long net to catch anything undesireable from the
top of the water. Usually wasps, and beetles, although we were fishing for
someone's tooth one time!

Sounds like a try on to me. particularly if he said the previous owners were
"crotchety" and wouldn't let them do that. Hoping you'd feel pressurised
into it...
Personally I wouldn't because of liability. Just imagine if one of them
drowned when you were out. If it's a free for all then you've no guarantee
that next doors 6yo won't bring his 2yo cousin and leave her there... or the
teenager down the road turns up with 20 friends (I don't know how big it
is), a load of alcohol and a loud radio late at night.
If you want to be nice then I'd give them a couple of hours a week when it
is freely open, with fairly strict rules-and include a parent rota for
lifeguarding that their parents should be on if they want to use it. Making
rule no.1 noone goes in until an adult is present.
Sorry if that sounds harsh/unfriendly but as a neighbour I would be really
pleased to have a couple of hours a week and certainly wouldn't expect it,
even if a previous neighbour has done it.

Enjoy.
Debbie

My dd#2 didn't allow anyone (including her children) in the pool area
(hers was an in ground pool in Miami) unless she was there.  There was
a fenced yard and originally a screen enclosure and the access was
through the kitchen sliding door.  

They had the pool when the youngest was born.  By that time the older
child was 5 and could swim.  What they did was lock the patio doors
(and indeed all the doors out of the house), and keep them locked at
all times.  (They went out through the garage, which had a remote and
that door was also usually locked)

DD#2 had been on a swim team, played water polo and was quite a good
swimmer and so was her DH who did a lot of free diving.

When the kids go to swim lessons, you go too.  You want to be able to
swim better than they can.  Start now if you can.  Don't wait for
spring.

Limit the number of people in the pool at any one time.  

Keep the pool chemicals locked up very securely.  

Never let anyone swim unless someone qualified is there who can pull
them out of the water if necessary.  That means that if your husband
is too big for you to pull out of the water (or you are too big for
him), then he can't swim.

A higher priority shold be making sure that kids and others can't get into
the pool without your permission. A kid got into my cousins' pool when they
weren't home. The kid won't be leaving his casket for a long time.

You need to learn what the laws are in your community as far as fencing is
concerned.

Good, you took my advice already! ;-)

No, you have appropriate and serious consequences for going into the pool or
on the deck without your permission. When the kids leave the deck before the
last adult. An exception may be when you need to go the bathroom; the kids
are allowed to stay on deck (even keep feet in pool) until you return. For
example, if there friends go on deck without permission, they don't come
back for a week. And if they go on deck without permission, no swimming for
a week. At three and seven, they should be able to understand that they
don't go on deck without permission. There shouldn't any room for discussion
here. And, no one is allowed on the deck until they are old enough without a
trusted adult on deck. At some point, they will be old enough to go on deck
for things like vacuuming the pool without going in. They will be old enough
when you can trust them to do the task without going into the pool and not
fall in by accident.

You can also get alarms that go off when the gate is opened or when someone
enters the pool.

To open the pool, do it yourself. You should contact the previous owners of
the house for instructions. If they won't give any advice, then call the
local pool company to show you how. And watch  how the pool was secured for
the winter for next fall. All talk to the neighbors. They may have helped.

For chemicals, there are two types: Chlorine and baquacil (or something
spelled similar to that). The chlorine is cheaper, but burns eyes. The
baquacil can cause allergies (you will know if your kids have them; then you
have to switch to chlorine). You can also get a system that generates ozone.

You need to add algicide every now and then.

Don't worry, your local pool place will tell you what to do. If they tell
you need to increase the water hardness (calcium increase) or the amount of
buffer (alkalinity increaser) in your pool, tell them you have the chemicals
at home. You do need to keep the pH at the right level, though.

You can buy chlorine, pH increase/decrease (pH + and pH -) and other
chemicals and supplies at Walmart, Target and some hardware stores (like
Ace).

You can also get a thing that automatically vacuums your pool
(http://www.cheappoolproducts.com/Pool~Cleaner_12~supplies.html).

House rules (besides those above): 1) Whenever kids are in the pool, there
is a responsible adult. If there are more than a few kids, the adult doesn't
swim, but keeps looking for drowning kids. (Obviously, you can rotate the
responsible adult.)
2) Kids don't go in the pool when babysitters are there.
3)  If a child is missing, you check the pool first. A child can breath in
the woods. Not under water. Seconds matter. Go on deck, to the edge of the
pool and scan the entire pool, bottom and surface, as well as the pool area.
4) Do not consider young children to be drownproof because they have had
swimming lessons or are wearing a life vest. Kids must be watched closely
while swimming.
5) Learn CPR (cardiopulmonary resuscitation). Babysitters and other
caretakers, such as grandparents and older siblings, should also know CPR.
6) Keep rescue equipment by the pool. Be sure a telephone is poolside with
emergency numbers posted nearby. Kids should know how to dial and use 9-1-1.
7) Remove toys from in and around the pool when it is not in use. Toys can
attract young children to the pool.
8) Never prop open the gate to a pool barrier. It should be locked whenever
adults are not around.
9) You don't swim in our toilet; you don't pee in our pool. You may also
want to encourage your kids pee in the woods when the need arises. Saves
trips into the house. Obviously, easier for boys. (We used to have a sign
that said: "Welcome to our ool. Notice there is no P in it. Please keep it
that way.")
10) You shower or use a bibet before coming into the pool and after pooping.
Poop can carry some organisms that cause disease that are not killed by
chlorine. When you shower, really the only area that needs to be washed is
around the anus (Seriously, while it seems disgusting to go in covered with
sweat and dirt, the filter and chlorine will take care of these. Even peeing
in the pool will carry disease only in rare circumstances; besides, if you
have babies in your pool, guess what the diapers don't hold in?). Quite
frankly, I doubt anyone really follows this rule.
11) No diving or jumping on or near anyone.
12) No running on deck.
13) No glass in the pool area. (or no glass and food or no glass, drink and
food).
14) Kids don't come into the house until they are dry.

You can build a changing area with some fencing. You can make it even better
if you bring out hot and cold water, put in a shower head and have the water
run into the grass or rain gutter drain.

You can also build a shed to house the pump and make it a changine area,
with a chair, some hooks for clothes, etc. You can also add a fridge for
drinks. (If you have a sewer connection you can easily tap into, you can add
a toilet. You should be able to use water from the pool, or bring out water
from the house. If you do that, add a sink.)

(If you do what I suggest with the water, you will also need to drain and
blow out the water in the pipes or add windshield washer fluid (which
contains methanol and acts as antifreeze) to them to keep them from freezing
over the winter. You need wash them out before using them.)

Things you can do:

1) You can get a light ball and play volleyball. Kids are probably too
young.
2) You can get things like golf balls or sticks (you can buy plastic ones
that sink) for kids to dive for.
3) Play blind man's bluff (like Marco Polo, but not saying "Marco").
4) Marco Polo (bet your figured this out).
5) Races.
6) Tag.
7) You can buy pool toys like basketball.
8) Noodles (at Target)
9) Floating chairs and stuff like that.
10) The neighbors will be there. They will know lots of pool games.
11) Also, get overhead lights for the pool. Cool at night.

If you have a reliable neighbor who will follow all your rules, that's fine.
Otherwise, pool is locked when you are not home.

Now is the time to do this. Actually, you really need to be comfortable in
the pool. You will be.

I'd make sure it was COMPLETELY secure.  And you might want to replace the
chain link fence with something less climbable.  Pool drownings are a big
problem here and most councils insist on a special kind of fence that doesn't
come with toe-holds, eg perspex or glass, or tubular fencing, at least 120cm
(4') tall,  with a child-proof gate.  It is only *slightly* less upsetting to
see that the body in the pool doesn't belong to your own child...

Don't take your eyes off them, basically, and allow one (swimming) parent per
non-swimming child.  Don't rely on life jackets or pool toys to keep children
safe.  And don't leave light furniture around the yard that your kids can use
to climb over the fence (my friend has two children who used a bench seat to
climb into the pool -- she spotted one in the pool area and came out to see
the other one reaching for the ball, which was in the water!).

I wouldn't keep the sunscreen near the pool as it degrades in high
temperatures.

My only tips are that you all learn to swim asap.

I would be too.  Could anyone be THAT stupid?  Did they leave their car keys
out so anyone could borrow their car too?

We got an above-ground pool when DS17 was 4, DS's 13 and 9 came after the
pool. I'm responsible for maintaining it.
It's been a great thing for cooling off and family fun. With younger kids
that aren't reliable swimmers, nothing substitutes for parental supervision.

Does it have an in-wall skimmer? They're great. If any people with long hair
swim in the pool, make sure they wear a bathing cap or put the hair in a
ponytail. Cleaning long hair out of a pool is disgusting!

Run the filter at night when electric rates are lower. Test the water to get
the pH right, it will save you money in knowing how much chemical to add. At
the first sign of algae, add algaecide, if it gets too green, shock it. If
you don't have a heater, get a solar cover, and use it, it will make the
pool a few degrees warmer.

I thought we'd have droves of friends and relatives begging to swim, but the
opposite has been the case. We must have very polite friends and relatives.

My biggest complaint during pool season is the wet towels and swimsuits
everywhere. Make sure the kids learn how to deal with them, or else you'll
go nuts.