Family Forum / Marriage / Marriage / December 2005

I sometimes get email from guys asking me for help in writing complaint
letters.  Here's one that I just fired off to a certain party.

I've made some obvious changes to hide the confidential information
that it contained; but, other than that, it's a good example of a solid
complaint letter that states a beef and requests some followup.

Note that it doesn't contain any of the usual bullshit reactionaryism
that the ass-kissing "anti-feminists" use for everything.  It's not
just a whiny "change my diaper" complaint, and it doesn't promulgate
some pet theory (which belongs on an editorial page) that is so big in
scope that only God will be able to fix things the next time he
recompiles the Universe.

Nor does it mince words with apologetics, or dedicate it's title page
to all of the great names in diplomacy.  This is activism.  It's not
quite a demand letter (though it could be - it almost was); but,
neither is it a begging letter.  It takes it's stand on rights, not
requesting favors.

It states specific problems with specific recommendations.  (As
specific as possible, in this case  ...I haven't yet worked out a
strategy for demanding a crucifixion).

In my work, I've found that when a letter like this goes through, there
will be various attempts to pump you for facts and details which should
be considered privileged information.  This is a Pangborn-like attempt
to flimflam you into bypassing courts with a pretense that you
volunteered the information (through informal channels) and waived your
rights.  It's good to keep a dossier with information that you've built
up.  Just don't hand it to them to check over.

----------------------------------------

XX. XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX:

I've been XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX for XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX for approximately
XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX.  You are listed as XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX.

Besides the level of incompetence that I've been both seeing and
getting from XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX, I have two other complaints.  The
question of quality I'll simply put down to the fact that XXXXX XXXXX
XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX :

1) I've been getting a high level of disrespect from one of XXXXX XXXXX
staff.

2) At my first XXXXX, I experienced a form of sexual harassment that
was uttered so flagrantly, that I couldn't believe I heard it.

The person who keeps giving me the disrespect is some female, by the
name of "XXXXX".  She seems to always be the one to answer the phone
line (after making you wait an inordinate amount of time).

It might not be simple disrespect, under the surface.  Most people
would probably call it a serious attitude problem, but it also seems to
border on some kind of suppressed hostility to point of being a
psychiatric problem.  I think that most people have probably run into
this kind of personality, at least once or twice.  It's the very
opposite of "perk" - but, that's not really the intent.

Essentially, she effects as low of a voice as she can, while putting
into it as much sarcasm and contempt as she can also manage.  The low
voice is almost like a hangover.  The sarcasm is a defense mechanism.
It makes simple communication difficult, and is basically unpleasant.

The people that I've known in the past who were doing this were
attempting to project a vile hatred at others.  If that's not what
she's doing, then she definitely has to develop some social skills.
The point is that neither I nor anyone else has to go through someone's
inner monster of broken dreams and disillusionment just to get simple
information over the phone.

The sexual harassment incident was during XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX.  A
certain female who, apparently, XXXXX XXXXX after I came in, said
basically this: "Hey, come on over here with me, handsome." - while
leading me toward XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX.  Another comment used the phrase
"good looking".  This was done twice.

I don't normally tolerate this kind of latter incident at all - for
reasons no one should need explained.  The only reason that I haven't
made the complaint for this incident, up until now, is because XXXXX
XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX XXXXX.

I think that some disciplinary action is in order for both cases.
While the latter case is definitely the more serious issue, the woman
didn't strike me with the malignancy that Ms. XXXXX did.  I think that
she just did something that was very stupid - and/or perhaps awkward -
for whatever reason.  Probably because of the obvious female culture
that exists at this XXXXX XXXXX.  Especially, due to the
disproportionate number of women employed.  But this XXXXX woman is
definitely hostile for some reason.

I get the overwhelming impression that this is another open-to-all
institution which is being coopted by women's interests.  I can see it
simply in the XXXXX posters that hang on the walls.  I suggest that we
may be looking at the root cause for XXXXX's disposition in this area.

If I don't hear from you at all, then I'll probably pursue this along
other channels in order to make certain that it doesn't just disappear.
Too many Men who have careers and jobs of their own to protect suffer
at the hands - not only of false accusers, but - of systematic
discrimination which punishes them with reprisal action for making
complaints of their own against pro-female sexism.

There is such a thing as Equal Rights for Men, too.  The unfortunate
truth is that female interests often compete with everyone's civil
rights to the point of monopolizing them.

(SIGNATURE)

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Obviously, this letter won't fit any situation, but it gives you
something to build on and get your thought processes going.

- - -

Making a new world for Men:

Turin

I have such sites to show you...
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http://members.fortunecity.com/turinturambar/
http://groups.google.com/group/Men_First

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"He who changeth, altereth, misconstrueth, argueth with, deleteth, or
maketh a lie about these words or causeth them to not be known shall
burn in hell forever and ever...."

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