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"Dad? I fell."

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The Ranger - 20 Dec 2007 14:48 GMT
I am the primary caregiver for my three healthy and experiential
daughter-units. With that "job title" comes certain
responsibilities. I am also lucky enough to be an involved
volunteer at both schools where staff and faculty know me by name,
not just through the regular surface daughter-association. Being
on-site almost every day at either school, getting hold of me is
not difficult, especially since it would seem my email and cell
are mentally imprinted in everyone-that-care's cerebral cortex.

Imagine my surprise when I picked Spawn up from an afterschool
event to the opening salvo of, "Dad. I fell. And I spent most of
the day in the office with ice on my wrist."

"Really? Why was that?"

"Well... I bent my wrist back when I fell."

"'Bent it back?' 'Fell?'"

"Uhm. Yeah."

"And how did both of these things happen?"

"Uhm. Are you going to get mad?"

"'Mad?' No. I would never get 'mad' but I might show a little
disappointment if you pulled something that you knew you
shouldn't... Such as climbing up and walking across the monkey
bars -- especially after it rained and the bars were a little
slick. And I'm guessing by the color your face has lit I'm not far
from the mark."

"No! I didn't walk across them this time..."

"Ah. Can you clarify a little more?"

"Uh. Do I hav'ta?"

I stopped and turned to face her, looking down at her 3'8" frame.
"What do you think?"

"I remembered that you didn't want me to do that so I haven't."
With that, she immediately went into her FedEx commercial,
"ButJohannewasfollowingMosesandMaryandtheyweregoingtodoitsoIneededtotellthemnottoandwhenIgotuptheretheyweretryingtowalkacrossthebarsandItoldthemtostopandtheydidn'tsoIwasgettingbackdownwhenmylegsslippedandIfellthroughandhitthegroundandmywristbentbacktomyarmandithurtalotandtheyardduty,Mrs.Onthspot,youknowwhosheisandthatshe'sbeenouryarddutyforthewholeyearandshehasbrownhairshelikesmealottoo,tookmestraighttotheoffice.Mrs.Cputiceonitandtoldmetorelax,IlikeMrs.Calottoo.ThatwasatrecessandIhadtostaytherethroughlunchbecauseithurtsomuch.ThenMs.McametocheckonmeandbringmemylunchandsomeschoolworkandtheytalkedandIdon'trememberwhattheysaidbutIstayedthereuntilafterschoolwhenIwasallowedtowatchthemovie.Thenyoucameandpickedmeup."

I listened quietly.

"You're mad, huh?"

"I'm a little confused. You've had ice on that most of the day?"

"Uh-huh."

"Let's check in with the office."

"Okay."

We walked into the office and were greeted immediately. "Mr.
Ranger! Did [Spawn] mention that she hurt herself today?"

"As a matter of fact, she was just telling me about it... That's
why we stopped in."

Enter Mr. Principal, stage left.

"Ah good. I'm glad you stopped in."

"Good. Good. It might be a good time to review the number you have
listed for me since I was never contacted. She missed most of her
class today? Isn't that unusual? Let's make sure you have the
correct information for contacting me."

"Our nurse felt it was only bruised."

"She missed almost the entire day with it iced and it's only
'bruised?' Doesn't that seem a little... Oh I don't know, lame?
Call me next time. I'm available. Make sure you have my cell
highlighted on her card. Check it. Now. I'm mystified by the
follow-up, too, but I'll come back and talk to you about that
later. When I'm a little less annoyed."

I spun Spawn back toward the door and speed-dialed her
pediatrician. "My youngest daughter fell earlier today at school
and I'm just now finding out about it. She bent her wrist back and
it's hot-to-the-touch. Yes; it's swollen and bruised. Yes; very
tender. The bruise has marched up her arm. Yes... <sigh> I'll meet
you in ER. We'll be there in ten."

Move Father Time forward another four hours. "So how do you like
your new body armor?"

"It hurts."

"And it'll bother you for another six weeks."

I have a few things to talk to Mr. Principal and that nurse today.

Merry frickin' Christmas to them.

The Ranger
JennP. - 20 Dec 2007 14:55 GMT
Wow, I can't believe that it was bad enough that she was out of class all
day but didn't call you. That's inexcuseable. I hope she has a speedy
recovery.

JennP.

>I am the primary caregiver for my three healthy and experiential
>daughter-units. With that "job title" comes certain responsibilities. I am
[quoted text clipped - 93 lines]
>
> The Ranger
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 19:04 GMT
> Wow, I can't believe that it was bad enough that she was
> out of class all day but didn't call you.

The more I talk to the other involved parents, the less I'm
willing to cut this current administration slack. There's
conservative attitudes towards what parents need to know and then
there's what we're experiencing.

> That's inexcuseable. I hope she has a speedy recovery.

Given that she's a quick-heal, I fully expect her to kick through
this minor setback before too long.

The Ranger
phelbooth - 22 Dec 2007 19:51 GMT
> > Wow, I can't believe that it was bad enough that she was
> > out of class all day but didn't call you.
[quoted text clipped - 10 lines]
>
> The Ranger

I'm glad she's better, really.  Still, my other concerns remain.......

ever read:
http://psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-20041112-000010.html

(Course, could argue Marano fails at life, too)
phelbooth - 30 Dec 2007 08:15 GMT
> Wow, I can't believe that it was bad enough that she was out of class all
> day but didn't call you. That's inexcuseable. I hope she has a speedy
[quoted text clipped - 99 lines]
>
> > The Ranger

So how is Spawn now?
The Ranger - 30 Dec 2007 16:36 GMT
[snip]
> So how is Spawn now?

Recovering just fine, thank you, and as active as ever.

She's learned a valuable life lesson during this convalescence:
That hitting oneself with a gauntlet cast is just as painful as
when one clocks an older sister's jaw. More so since one often
doesn't expect to club oneself in the nose.

The Ranger
Tori M. - 20 Dec 2007 14:59 GMT
> Merry frickin' Christmas to them.
>
> The Ranger

Ugh.. poor thing.  You would thing the adults would know that isn't a
good sign with the spreading of the bruise.

Tori
phelbooth - 20 Dec 2007 15:31 GMT
> > Merry frickin' Christmas to them.
>
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
>
> Tori

Is your school nurse there all day?  Due to budget cuts in our
district, a nurse goes to 3-4 schools each day on a rotation...so if
she saw your child early, it may have only looked bruised, whereas
later on there would clearly be a problem.  This may not be the case
for you, but I know it's a logical consequence in many places where
staff is being cut--so we parents have to give staff a little slack,
too.  As for teachers-administrators not intervening, well, they
really are not medically trained and they, too, are dealing with
pretty large classes with lots of bumps and bruises among youth.  (I
don't teach K-12, but I have friends who do...it's tough on them right
now!)
The Ranger - 20 Dec 2007 15:57 GMT
[snip]
> Is your school nurse there all day?

No and I'm guessing the "nurse" mentioned was the 1st aid-trained
secretary. We're "lucky" if the district nurse makes it 3Xs a
month to Spawn's school.

> [..] so we parents have to give staff a little slack [..]

I'm very forgiving and cut staff a lot of slack. A quick call is
all that would have been necessary, "You're daughter fell and is
in the office. No you don't have to come down." That didn't
happen. Talking to other parents this morning, and staff at two
other schools, this, unfortunately, is an ongoing problem with the
new administration. Their now-legendary inability dial a phone
number is the joke. I plan on making sure this is not going to be
an issue in the future -- at least with my daughter-unit.

The Ranger
Cindi - HappyMamatoThree - 20 Dec 2007 16:33 GMT
> [snip]
>> Is your school nurse there all day?
[quoted text clipped - 12 lines]
> dial a phone number is the joke. I plan on making sure this is not going
> to be an issue in the future -- at least with my daughter-unit.

The staff in our school district is the opposite. They call if the child
isn't able to return to class in 15 minutes. Heck we have had to pick up Ian
because he was coughing and disturbing class. It was only allergies but...
I would have to take some time and chill out before I went and exploded at
the principal. That really is a ridiculous situation.

Hey, how did the ball kicking young ladies do? Has their tournament happened
yet? I didn't check the schedule to see.

Cindi

> The Ranger
The Ranger - 20 Dec 2007 17:18 GMT
[snip]
> The staff in our school district is the opposite. They
> call if the child isn't able to return to class in 15
> minutes.

That was the previous administration's policy. :)

> I would have to take some time and chill out before
> I went and exploded at the principal. That really is
> a ridiculous situation.

Indeed.

> Hey, how did the ball kicking young ladies do?

I'll follow up on this later. That's a totally 'nother area of
stress.

The Ranger
Cindi - HappyMamatoThree - 20 Dec 2007 18:59 GMT
> [snip]
>> The staff in our school district is the opposite. They
[quoted text clipped - 12 lines]
>
> I'll follow up on this later. That's a totally 'nother area of stress.

So much for my attempt at taking your mind off the problem and giving you a
chance to focus on something else. *laughs*

How is Spawn feeling today? Is she hopped up on Motrin? I do hope that some
of her pain is gone in time for Christmas Eve's excitement, and Christmas
Mornings treats.

Cindi

> The Ranger
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 19:07 GMT
[snip]
> So much for my attempt at taking your mind off the
> problem and giving you a chance to focus on something
> else. *laughs*

Heh. ;)

> How is Spawn feeling today? Is she hopped up on Motrin?
> I do hope that some of her pain is gone in time for Christmas
> Eve's excitement, and Christmas Mornings treats.

The Kid's Motrin upset her stomach last night. "Dad? I don't...
/blurg!"

"Holy Kr! Get me a towel!"

This morning we attempted a banana and Kid's Advil. That seemed to
set on her stomach much better. Or at least she didn't push it
back up on me this time. :)

The Ranger
JennP. - 20 Dec 2007 19:04 GMT
As for teachers-administrators not intervening, well, they
> really are not medically trained and they, too, are dealing with
> pretty large classes with lots of bumps and bruises among youth.  (I
> don't teach K-12, but I have friends who do...it's tough on them right
> now!)

True, but if it was bad enough for her to be in the office with ice all day,
he should have been called.

JennP.
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 19:10 GMT
>> As for teachers-administrators not intervening, well, they
>> really are not medically trained and they, too, are dealing
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
> True, but if it was bad enough for her to be in the office
> with ice all day, he should have been called.

Which is the policy/procedure -- and has been for the last six
years I've been reviewing said policies. Implementation, though,
with the current staff is the only breakdown here.

The Ranger
Kiticat - 20 Dec 2007 17:03 GMT
> "And it'll bother you for another six weeks."
>
[quoted text clipped - 3 lines]
>
> The Ranger

Poor little chickadee. I can't believe they didn't phone you. What on
earth was the point in her spending half the day in the office with ice?
If it wasnt helping after 20 mins and it was looking worse you needed to
 know. They really need to review their first aid proceedures. Does her
school have a first aid policy you could look at?

Sarah
The Ranger - 20 Dec 2007 17:16 GMT
> [..] They really need to review their first aid proceedures.
> Does her school have a first aid policy you could look at?

I've reviewed them for the last six years. The policies are the
same... Implementation (this year) seems to be the true issue at
heart.

The Ranger
Nan - 20 Dec 2007 19:51 GMT
>"It hurts."
>
>"And it'll bother you for another six weeks."

Poor chicklet :-(

>I have a few things to talk to Mr. Principal and that nurse today.
>
>Merry frickin' Christmas to them.

I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end ;-)
We are so very fortunate to have a full-time nurse on staff at our
school.

Nan
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 19:14 GMT
>>"It hurts."
>>
>>"And it'll bother you for another six weeks."
>>
> Poor chicklet :-(

It's certainly added a level of complexity towards the upcoming
winter break that we'd (as a family) had never experience prior.
:)

>>I have a few things to talk to Mr. Principal and that nurse
>>today.
>>
>>Merry frickin' Christmas to them.
>>
> I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end ;-)

Mr. Principal didn't appreciate it either.

We'll see if he denies the kids playing on the monkey bars as a
result. He tried to deny them playing on the field because one
child twisted her ankle from running but a few of us convinced him
of the folly of _that_ particular rule.

The Ranger
Cindi - HappyMamatoThree - 21 Dec 2007 19:22 GMT
>>>"It hurts."
>>>
[quoted text clipped - 17 lines]
> ankle from running but a few of us convinced him of the folly of _that_
> particular rule.

I almost laughed Pepsi onto the keyboard. Where exactly would the children
hang out if he took away the field and the monkey bars? The blacktop where
they will fall and scrape off their elbows and knees? Sounds a brilliant
administrator.

Cindi

> The Ranger
Kiticat - 22 Dec 2007 20:23 GMT
> It's certainly added a level of complexity towards the upcoming
> winter break that we'd (as a family) had never experience prior.
> :)

you know thats an awful pun slipped in there!
Froggy - 20 Dec 2007 19:52 GMT
> I am the primary caregiver for my three healthy and experiential
> daughter-units. With that "job title" comes certain responsibilities.
[quoted text clipped - 105 lines]
>
> The Ranger

They didn't call you?  I'd be having a chat with the principle that if
any damage was done because you weren't notified, they'll be getting
the bills from her ER visit.

Signature

Froggy

phelbooth - 21 Dec 2007 06:17 GMT
> > I am the primary caregiver for my three healthy and experiential
> > daughter-units. With that "job title" comes certain responsibilities.
[quoted text clipped - 112 lines]
> --
> Froggy

Isn't the best question to ask, what can we do to make sure every
child who is ever harmed, at school or anywhere, receives the best
medical treatment at all times?  How can we work together to do that?

Indeed, Merry Christmas to All--
Fill
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 06:28 GMT
[snip]
> Isn't the best question to ask, what can we do to
> make sure every child who is ever harmed, at
> school or anywhere, receives the best medical
> treatment at all times?  How can we work
> together to do that?

The question_s_ to ask are:
1) How can we improve the lines of communication?
2) What number do you have listed in case of an emergency?
3) Why didn't I (or any of my "in case of an emergency, please
contact XXX") receive a call?

> Indeed, Merry Christmas to All--

We're working on it.

The Ranger
Teri - 20 Dec 2007 19:53 GMT
>I am the primary caregiver for my three healthy and experiential
>daughter-units. With that "job title" comes certain responsibilities. I am
[quoted text clipped - 93 lines]
>
> The Ranger

When she explained the fall - the first thing I thought was - she broke her
scaphoid (old time osteos still call it the navicular)  - I broke mine
almost three years ago - I hope she heals quickly and hope you kick a little
booty.  It was totally mis handled.
Teri
Marc - 21 Dec 2007 06:50 GMT
> I spun Spawn back toward the door and speed-dialed her
> pediatrician. "My youngest daughter fell earlier today at school
[quoted text clipped - 13 lines]
>
> Merry frickin' Christmas to them.

I hope the recovery is smooth, and the pain has decreased signifcantly
already. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Marc
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 06:58 GMT
[snip]
> I hope the recovery is smooth, and the pain has decreased
> signifcantly already.

An active 9-yo that is dominantly right-handed... The pain's
increased (due to attempted regular use) and there's noticeable
swelling (outside the cast) with not much ability to "relieve"
said swelling. <sigh>

It's going to be a long winter break...

The Ranger
phelbooth - 21 Dec 2007 07:07 GMT
> [snip]
>
[quoted text clipped - 9 lines]
>
> The Ranger

Has your daughter tried communicating to others her age in pain,
perhaps in alt.my-school-neglected-me?

Accidents come with kids, and as far as I know, no adult is entirely
responsible.

Please, be Merry!  And take your poor daughter to a counselor if she
feels misused.

--Best, Fill
Nan - 21 Dec 2007 10:42 GMT
>> [snip]
>>
[quoted text clipped - 18 lines]
>Please, be Merry!  And take your poor daughter to a counselor if she
>feels misused.

I think you've missed Ranger's point.  He's upset that the school did
not attempt to contact him when it became apparent that her injury was
more than just a bruise.  He's already communicated that HOW the
accident happened was not the school's fault.

Nan
phelbooth - 22 Dec 2007 22:20 GMT
> On Thu, 20 Dec 2007 23:07:54 -0800 (PST), phelbooth
>
[quoted text clipped - 31 lines]
>
> Nan

I'm sorry for misunderstanding, Nan.  I thought he said that no one at
the school noticed that the injury had become so bruised or heard the
child complaining of intense pain.  My son grew up in a large urban
city public school, so it was very common for only the most immediate
and violent cases to be prioritized (gang violence and so on).  Poor
little Spawn, however, is apparently growing up in a much more
protective environment, so shame on those adults who didn't notice her
suffering.  It's a good thing she has her daddy, isn't it!

Again, my humblest apologies for misreading, Ranger-Man.
toto - 22 Dec 2007 23:14 GMT
>I'm sorry for misunderstanding, Nan.  I thought he said that no one at
>the school noticed that the injury had become so bruised or heard the
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
>protective environment, so shame on those adults who didn't notice her
>suffering.  It's a good thing she has her daddy, isn't it!

Even in my inner city school, if a child was sitting in the office
with ice on her for almost the entire day, someone would have been
called.  And the secretary could have noticed that the swelling was
not going down.

--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 14:33 GMT
> Has your daughter tried communicating to others her age in pain,
> perhaps in alt.my-school-neglected-me?

You're comprehension is pretty poor so I'll make it easier for you
to understand the situation.

> Accidents come with kids, and as far as I know, no adult is
> entirely
> responsible.

The only responsibility I pinned on the adults at the school was
that I expected someone to contact me, something this current
administration is wont to do with anyone. The policies are sound,
the procedures work; it's a matter of follow-through.

> Please, be Merry!  And take your poor daughter to a counselor
> if she feels misused.

You don't read so good.

The Ranger
Cindi - HappyMamatoThree - 21 Dec 2007 16:54 GMT
> Has your daughter tried communicating to others her age in pain,
> perhaps in alt.my-school-neglected-me?

I really don't think that your understanding of the situation is very clear.
Ranger never said that Spawn felt like the school was at fault for her
injury, her pain, or that she in any way felt neglected by anyone. Seeing
just the name of the newsgroup you recommended makes me wonder if there is a
place at all for a nine year old in such a group.

> Accidents come with kids, and as far as I know, no adult is entirely
> responsible.

(This is just my take on the situation and what I understand from Ranger's
post and follow ups.)

The responsibility the school ignored was the need for them to contact the
parent or a responsibile party as soon as an injury was recognized. I am
lucky in that the schools my children go to have consistently and reliablity
called me if anything has ever happened. Even if it doesn't warrant them
coming home early from school, I get a call, well except when they don't
tell a teacher or an adult that they are hurt, their schools aren't very
good in the mind reading department. If the kids go to the nurse, and it
isn't just a kid overreacting to something, they a phone call should be made
and the parent informed of the situation. Even a Motrin or a Tylenol would
have given Spawn a bit of relief for the pain and swelling, but that can't
be given without a parent so a simple phone call might have helped reduce
just that even if it wasn't broken.

> Please, be Merry!  And take your poor daughter to a counselor if she
> feels misused.

Misused? I fear I don't understand that terminology in this instance.
Everyone was loving and kind to her, if I read the post correctly, they just
didn't follow through with contacting a parent who could seek further
treatment for her injury.

I am sure that Spawn will have a good Christmas, it's just going to be that
much more difficult and it will be painful thanks to someone who didn't call
her Daddy. Sad.

And bitch all you need Ranger, I would be exploding right now.

Cindi

> --Best, Fill
news - 21 Dec 2007 18:12 GMT
>> Has your daughter tried communicating to others her age in pain,
>> perhaps in alt.my-school-neglected-me?
[quoted text clipped - 4 lines]
> Seeing just the name of the newsgroup you recommended makes me wonder if
> there is a place at all for a nine year old in such a group.

phelbooth epic fails at life.
Kiticat - 21 Dec 2007 18:38 GMT
> [snip]
>> I hope the recovery is smooth, and the pain has decreased
[quoted text clipped - 8 lines]
>
> The Ranger

I know you aren't daft <g> but it might be worth  checking that its ok
if theres marked swelling outside the cast and increasing pain.
Sarah
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 19:16 GMT
> I know you aren't daft <g> [..]

:) There are some that would argue that point unto death.

The Ranger
Dizzysmamma - 21 Dec 2007 20:36 GMT
> [snip]
>> I hope the recovery is smooth, and the pain has decreased
[quoted text clipped - 7 lines]
>
> The Ranger

I'm actually kinda surprised they casted it so soon.  When DS broke his arm
when he was 2, they put a temp cast on it for about a week to make sure
there wasn't going to be any more swelling before putting a "permanent" cast
on.  If it is still swelling, and if you haven't already done so, take her
back to the ER to have the cast checked.  Aside from the issue of having
something cutting off her circulation, there is also the issue of having a
cast that's too loose when the swelling finally goes down.

Have her sling set so that her hand is almost shoulder level as that will
help a great deal with the swelling and the pain.  It won't throb quite so
much if she keeps above heart level.

Give her lots of hugs and loves from us.  Oh and take her to let Santa sign
her cast.  She'll be the envy of all the kids at school.

Merry Christmas to you and yours.

Angela
The Ranger - 21 Dec 2007 21:54 GMT
[snip Puffed Daughter-unit Arm in Cast]
> I'm actually kinda surprised they casted it so soon. When DS
> broke his arm when he was 2, they put
[quoted text clipped - 7 lines]
> loose when the swelling finally goes
> down.

We took her to our pediatric orthopedist this morning to make sure
there weren't "other" issues the ER doctor might've missed.
Squirming 9-yo aren't always best for the adult doctors to
diagnose.

The Bone Doc specializes in kids and we're currently on her
"family discount" plan with the older two being seen so
frequently.

> Have her sling set so that her hand is almost shoulder
> level as that will help a great deal with the swelling
> and the pain.  It won't throb quite so much if she
> keeps above heart level.

Do you know what this does to her playability? <EG> That simple
cast was totally inconveniencing Spawn... The sling is worse.

> Give her lots of hugs and loves from us.  Oh and take
> her to let Santa sign her cast.  She'll be the envy of all
> the kids at school.

Yep.

> Merry Christmas to you and yours.

Thank ya kindly. Back-atchya.

The Ranger
Mirthyl Fodad - 23 Dec 2007 00:20 GMT
>I am the primary caregiver for my three healthy and experiential
>daughter-units. With that "job title" comes certain responsibilities. I am
[quoted text clipped - 93 lines]
>
> The Ranger

Give 'em what 4, Ranger!

Atalanta

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