Family Forum / Parenting / Step Parents / March 2006

My name is Matt, and I have been a step-dad for 1 year now. My fiancee
and I just recently turned 24. My step-daughter (I will call her Mary)
is 6, turning 7 this summer. Our intergration as a family has gone as
smoothly as could be expected for 23/24 year old parents raising a 6
year old. But faily recently we have seen a recuring problem. Mary will
either not hear anything I say, or ignore my presence completely. Here
is an example. Mary will ask a question out in the open for anyone to
answer. I will ask answer the question, and while I am still speaking
she will speak over me to re-ask the question to her mother. If I ask
her a question or ask her to do something, she will look at me, but she
will not respond, as if I never even spoke. We all understand that she
is very "attached" to her mother, and we have taken extra steps to
ensure she doesn't feel like I am dividing them. But part of me feels
that its that extra care that has singled me out.  Sometimes I feel
like im just the "male figure" with no actuall place in the family, and
its putting a strain my relationship with my fiancee.